A Harry Potter Story
by Japanese Vampire Babe II
Summary: A mysterious girl named Sakura has decided to use the YuGiOh cast for her own evil plots. Her latest? A Harry Potter play.
1. The play

A Harry Potter Story

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Chapter: 1

A/N: Alright here goes. I really just wanted to write something and this popped into my mind. If it sucks I understand completely. If it doesn't… woo hoo! By the way, the people and their yami's are separate. (Ex: Yugi and Yami are two separate people) Well you don't want to hear me babble on the whole day so onto the story!

Disclaimer: DON'T SUE MEEEE! I'm just a normal… (Well maybe not normal) girl that has no money. I don't own these characters and probably never will… happy now?

(A stage appears and a curtain lifts to reveal a very confused group of people) (These people are none other than the YuGiOh crew!(Pretty cool huh?) A girl walks up to a podium carrying a stack of papers that look very much like a script)

Girl: (taps microphone) ahem. Can you hear me now? … Good! Hello ladies and gentlemen! I'm Sakura. Nice to meet you. Today…

Kaiba: (not able to stand it anymore) What the Hell do you think you're doing! There isn't anyone there!

Mokuba: Yeah!

(Following this outburst room fills with the complaints of the confused group. Sakura silently stands drumming her fingers on the top of the podium and waits patiently for the complaints to cease. And finally they do)

Sakura: Today we are putting on a play based on the books and movies of Harry Potter. As soon as the cast is dressed we'll start. Until than go and take a short break. See you in a little bit!

(Curtains close and the YuGiOh crew circles the girl that has captured them)

Kaiba: (barely restraining himself) I'll ask once more… what are you doing.

Sakura: (smiles) a play.

Joey: An' who's the audience.

Sakura: (smiles) they're not here yet.

Bakura: (glowering) then what was the point of that?

Sakura: There wasn't one.

(The questioning and answering continued for quite some time with the group getting angrier with the ignorant girl's two to five word answers. Finally the group gave up and let the girl dress them up and give them scripts. After a while the girl left them and went back out to the stage to face her audience (there was one this time). Applause and cheers sounded and she began)

Sakura: Hello ladies and gentlemen! Having a good time?

Crowd: (cheers)

Sakura: Good! Well before I get into a seriously long and boring story on why I'm doing this, let's go right to the play!

Crowd: (cheers)

Sakura: I introduce Harry Potter in my own making!

(The stage fades out and Kaiba walks on to the stage wearing a billowing cloak and sporting a lightning bolt shaped line in the middle of his forehead (because I can, he is… HARRY!) The stage lights back up to show a perfect display of the inside of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry)

Kaiba: (walking down the halls) _'Damn, how did I get myself into this'_ (bumps into someone) (growl) Watch where you're going.

Yugi: Oh sorry. (Yugi is dressed in a slightly less pretty cloak but that's okay, he also has dyed red hair. (Yugi is…. RON!) Sakura holds up a cardboard sign that says 'Imbecile! That's Harry!) Wait… Hi Harry!

Kaiba: _'Crap. He's supposed to be my best friend?'_ Hi Ron… sorry…

Yugi: (smiles and inside dies of shock) that's okay. Where are you going?

Kaiba: (starts to shrug then remembers he's in a play) I mean, I'm going to… see Hermione.

Yugi: Great. I'll come too.

(The two continue to walk down the hallway and eventually got to the Gryffindor common room door)

Electronic Picture: Password?

Kaiba: Eh…

Yugi: Umm… Slytherin sucks?

EP: Access granted (swings open)

Yugi: Alright. We got in, now what?

Kaiba: We have to find Hermione.

Yugi: Right.

(They stand in the same place for a good ten minutes)

Kaiba: Maybe she's not here.

Yugi: Maybe…

(A ticked off girl with poofy hair comes down from the girl's dormitory. The two boys back off almost instinctively)

Tea: Where were you two! I was looking all over for you!

Kaiba: We were right here. Where were you?

Tea: (brushes a piece of hair out of her face (Tea is… HERMIONE!)) I was upstairs looking for you.

Yugi: Tea… You know boys aren't aloud in the girl's dormitory. Why would you be looking up there?

Tea: ……because I couldn't find you anywhere else.

Kaiba: Whatever let's go.

Tea: (smirks) whatever you say Harry.

(The two turned three group exits the room and travels down the dreaded long hall they came from and go down some moving stairs. After awhile they make it to the great halls where they find an empty table and sit at it. Soon a smug looking blonde comes over to them. His obviously expensive green cloak billowing in the nonexistent wind)

Kaiba: What do you want mut… I mean Malfoy. (Growls)

Joey: (smirk) Oh nothing in particular. Just to see the famous Harry Potter. Nothing more (And Joey is… DRACO!)

Kaiba: Well you can get lost. You're company is not needed.

Joey: (smirk) if you say so Oh High and Mighty.

(The drop dead annoyingly cute blonde then leaves their presence with a shocked rich boy looking after him… the stuck up act does him well…)

Tea: _'Why did Joey have to be Draco? Kaiba suits the role better'_ That jerk.

Kaiba: Don't pay him any mind Hermione. He's not worth our time.

Yugi: Of course he's not worth our time. Stupid jerk.

Tea: Well… What should we do now?

Yugi: Why don't we go back to our dorm and party? Then we can sleepily go to classes in the morning.

Kaiba: Sure.

(This causes to turn around AGAIN and go back to the place they came. Once they reach the room they are pretty much ran over with people running out. The trio shoulder their way in to find Marik and Bakura setting off stink bombs)

Yugi: (cough cough) Fred, George, What are you doing!

Bakura: What does it look like? (Bakura is… FRED!)

Marik: Setting off stink bombs of course (Marik is… GEORGE!)

Tea: (cough) someone open a window!

Kaiba: (completely unaffected he walks gracefully over to a wall and opens a window.)

Yugi: That's better. You guys want to stay up and party all night?

Bakura: Sounds great!

Marik: Couldn't have thought of a better idea myself. But to make it a little more fun… (Looks over at Bakura)

Bakura: (evilly twinkle in eyes) Why don't we invite Malfoy and his cronies?

Kaiba: (not saying a word)

Yugi: …sure why not? (Sakura holds up sign that says 'morons! They're your enemies!' That they completely ignore)

(Kaiba goes over to the window and whistles. Shortly after a mechanical snowy owl comes to view and he hands the bird a piece of parchment. The bird flies off and twenty minutes later Draco, Crabbe and Goyle are in the Gryffindor dormitory)

Yugi: So… What should we play?

Bakura: Let's play…

Marik: Spin the Bottle.

Yugi: (whips around) WHAT! NOOOO!

Marik: Hush little brother. You're going to wake the teachers.

Kaiba: We're not playing that game.

Joey: (smirks) what is this I hear? The great Harry Potter backing away from a challenge?

Kaiba: (glares daggers) so… you want to play that way. Okay I'll play your stupid game.

Duke: (Worried glances at the two of them (Duke is a much more handsome… GOYLE!))

Tristan: (Not exactly liking where this is going (Tristan is a slightly more handsome… CRABBE!))

(So with fire in between the two boys (Joey and Kaiba) the game starts)

Tea: Hey guys. (Everyone glares at her) You do realize that most of you are guys right? If we play spin the bottle you're going to end up kissing each other.

Yugi: Yeah, where's …Ginny?

Bakura: Come now Ron. You don't want to bring Ginny's pure mind into this mess do you?

Yugi: You're completely right. Don't know what I was thinking…

Marik: (Pulls out a bottle) shall we get started then?

Tea: You know what? (Stands up) I'm going to take Ginny's advice and go get some sleep. Don't want to be sleepy on my first day of school.

Bakura: Oh, I should believe not. Get moving then.

(Tea leaves leaving only boys to stare at each other)

Duke: Uh… you want to switch to truth or dare?

Marik: (sets bottle down) Heavens no. How much fun would that be? I'll start.

(The bottle of doom, for that is what we shall call it now, spins and spins and spins and landed on… BAKURA!)

Marik: (smirks) Oh darn…

Bakura: Yes, the tragedy…

(Marik sighed and you could tell he was really disappointed. He leaned over to his left, where Bakura was sitting and started kissing him passionately. The temperature rose dramatically and Kaiba silently wished he'd kept the window open)

(A few people in the crowd gasped and looked away but even more gasped and leaned forward in their seats (pervs))

Marik: (smiles evilly and breaks the kiss. Turns to Bakura) your turn to spin.

Bakura: (Also smiling) I guess you're right (spins the bottle)

(It spins and spins and spins and finally lands on… YUGI!)

Yugi: Crap…

Bakura: (He gets to his knees and kneels over the middle of the game space to get to Yugi)

Yugi: Shit…

Bakura: (Kisses Yugi)

Yugi: (Eyes bulge and starts to struggle. Does not succeed and gives up since his friends aren't helping him (A/N: That was a very bad thing to do hee hee 'receives glare from Yugi fans' sigh fine fine) Bakura finally releases him and he falls over)

Bakura: (smiles seductively) Yugi, it's your turn to spin…

Yugi: (goes white in the face, gets up and timidly spins the bottle)

(It spins and spins and spins and finally lands on… JOEY! (Gasp))

Yugi: Fudge…

Joey: (Attempts to smile… not working. Note that Joey is on Yugi's right) let's just get this over with.

Yugi: (leans quickly toward Joey and kisses him. Then pulls away just as fast.)

Joey: (spins the bottle)

(It spins and spins and spins and lands on…KAIBA! (The horror the horror!))

Joey: (Not even attempting to smile)

Kaiba: (Smirks) Losing courage Mutt?

Joey: I'll have you know I'm a pure blood wizard!

Kaiba: Not exactly acting like it are you? Not that I'd want to kiss that filthy mug of yours anyway. You probably kiss like shit.

Joey: (growl) _'I'll show you'_ (leans forward toward Seto and pushes him to the ground kissing him passionately (A/N: 'Waves SetoXJoey flag in the air')

(Both having to show the other just how brave they are this goes on for a good five minutes. Neither giving in and neither letting the other dominate. It was a battle of will power and they both knew it)

Yugi: (blushing madly) Um…. (A/N: Well someone has to intervene) Guys?

Joey: (lets out moan)

(At some point in those five minutes the battle of wills became a battle of passion… great…)

Yugi: (Takes a stick out of nowhere and starts poking them with it) Yoo hoo… Anyone there?

Tristan: (Takes stick from Yugi) Come on man, you can't do it like that (Starts to hit them)

Joey: (Snaps out of whatever he was in) Uh… Crabbe? Goyle? What are you doing here?

Duke: Saving you?

Joey: From what?

Duke: Yourself (points at Kaiba)

Joey: (looks down and jumps off the brunette)

Kaiba: About time you snapped out of it. (Sits up)

Joey: Damn you Harry Potter! You jinxed me!

Kaiba: What! If it was anyone it would have been those two (points at Marik and Bakura) I had nothing to do with that! You came on to me!

Joey: (smiles) Yelling are we Potter? You seem to be loosing the cool you've tried so hard to maintain.

Kaiba: Damn you Malfoy. I don't know why we brought you here in the first place.

Bakura: (smiles) if you'll remember correctly…

Marik: (Also smiling) we suggested it. But you sent the owl…

Kaiba: (looks away) so? It was still your idea, (stands up) By the way… (Starts to walk away) I'm leaving.

(After this statement everyone starts to leave until only Marik and Bakura were left facing each other)

Marik: Darn, they left.

Bakura: Pity… they left us alone.

Marik: (smiles evilly) we should get them back for that.

Bakura: Oh I don't know. (Smiles evilly) But it does sound like a good idea…

(So after awhile, making sure everyone was asleep. The twins walked quietly to the boys' dormitory and proceeded to lay out a whole lot of their newest creation, mouse traps that were jinxed to start on fire when they were touched. They then used a secret passage to get to the Slytherin dormitory and set up their creations there as well. After a job well done the twins walked back to the Gryffindor common room and went to sleep)

A/N: (evil laughter is heard) so… what do you think will happen on their first day of school. Will anyone survive? Who are the rest of the characters? If you want to know review the story and I'll think about it. Wahahahahahaha… ahem. Ciao for now….


	2. Chapter 2

A Harry Potter Story

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Chapter 2

A/N: Right… well. This is the second chapter. Yay! That means I got reviews. Yay! I'm so proud of myself for getting 3 reviews… Alright as you know today is the first day of classes at school. Just a quick reminder, the characters and their yami's are separate people. Of course I'm sure you all remember that from the first chapter. Another thing, as my friend pointed out, these people obviously don't know their scripts very well (or for that matter don't know it at all) and therefore are not perfect people. By the way, you probably noticed by now, but for the good of the story Kaiba is very OOC. Also you must remember that whatever I think goes right to the computer, no revising or anything, only spell check. Oh and no more spin the bottle, it was calling me, sorry (Please don't kill me FireDemonessJaganshi! She's an authoress on here too. Check her story out!). I'll just stop babbling now. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Well you know the deal. I don't own them I don't get sued… right? I hope so… It's probably for the best I don't own them anyway. I can always dream though! Can't I?

(A sleeping person wakes up to the smell of smoke. He turns over and, realizing something smells like its burning sits bolt upright, causing the strategically placed mouse traps to go off setting him on fire as well.)

Kaiba: (jumps) Oh Shit!

(Kaiba jumps out of bed and searches frantically for something to put out the fire. Finding a fire extinguisher being handed to him from off stage he gratefully grabs it and starts hosing himself down with it. He also (since he had the time of course) manages to put out Yugi's fire also. This unfortunately causes the boy to wake up and wonder why the walls are white and fluffy.)

Yugi: (rubs eyes and sees Kaiba wearing the white fluffy… attire?) Kaiba? Is that you there? Why are you wearing white?

Kaiba: (growls from anger and embarrassment) Our sweet brothers have used another one of their great inventions on us… Apparently they set fire to anything that moves…

Yugi: (Lies down to go back to sleep (since they still have a good hour left until classes start)) I hope Malfoy's okay.

Kaiba: I hope he isn't…

Yugi: (waves him off) Whatever…

(The Slytherin boys also wake up in about the same fashion except nobody handed them a fire extinguisher so they had to make do without. Particularly, they had to manually hook up a hose to the sink and drench the walls to make the fire finally subside. So soaking wet, the boys got out of their room, changed, and went into the Great Hall to have breakfast where they met up with the people from the Gryffindor House.)

Kaiba: (growling to himself) I'll get those two back. I'll get them…

Joey: (strolls over to the Gryffindor table) Hey Potter, did you know it looks like you died your hair white?

Kaiba: (glares at the blonde) Did you know it actually looks like you washed your hair? (A/N: Looks like someone's still angry about the night before…)

Tea: (looks over) Oh Harry, don't lower yourself to his level. Ignore him.

Kaiba: (and ignore him he did) Ron, what are our classes?

Yugi: (looks at schedule) Looks like we have Transfiguration with Slytherin, Herbology with Hufflepuff, Divination with Ravenclaw, Astronomy with Hufflepuff, Defense Against the Dark Arts with Slytherin, lunch, Magical Creatures with Ravenclaw and Potions with Slytherin. That's quite a schedule.

Kaiba: (shrug) It doesn't matter, at least we get paid. (Sakura holds up sign that says 'NO YOU DON'T') Paid as in learn. At least we learn something.

Yugi: (rolls eyes) Yeah, right, learn something. Oh and you have Quidditch so you get out of Potions 30 minutes early and you play…(flips through schedule which is really a script in disguise) Slytherin.

Kaiba: (smirks) I get to play against Malfoy. I'll beat him for sure.

Tea: (rolls eyes) Harry, I know you and Malfoy are enemies and everything (looks over at Joey who is standing patiently by them being ignored. You'd think he wasn't standing right next to them the way they were talking) but…

Joey: Yeah, Potter, because there's no way you'd beat me anyway.

Kaiba: (smirk) Is that a challenge?

Joey: (fuming) Yes!

Kaiba: Alright. You're on.

Yugi: (taps Kaiba's shoulder) Harry? Maybe you should rethink your challenge. Remember what happened last time?

Kaiba: This is different. Now let's go to Transfiguration.

Yugi: With Slytherin.

Kaiba: Shoot.

(So the boys (and one girl) slowly make their way to Transfiguration dreading the whole hour they would have to spend with the Slytherins. When they get near the door they look down as they walk in because they are now a good ten minutes late. (For Professor McGonagall I decided to do something different. Sorry if you don't like it but I thought it was funny so that's how it's going to be))

Yugi: (looking at his feet) Sorry we got lost.

Ryou: (tries to smile) No problem. Please take your seat.

(The boys both look shocked up at their teacher. It is none other than Ryou standing disgustedly (I would be too) at the front of the class wearing a dress and a wizard hat (he refused to let me put it in a bun. Shoot ) So Ryou is… PROFFESSOR MCGONAGALL!)

Joey: (trying to suppress laughter)

Ryou: (shoots daggers in his direction) Do you want detention?

Joey: (stops laughing) No, ma'am. (Starts again)

Ryou: (exasperatedly) Okay! Enough take out your wands and try to turn something into something else. You should remember what the spell is from last year. (Leaves and sits behind his desk glaring daggers at some paperwork that isn't magically signing itself, or something like that)

(Of course that's how they spent the rest of the class hour with Tea the only person who turned anything. Kaiba and Joey temporarily put their differences aside after that to pick on her and Yugi and Kaiba forgot their friendship (temporarily) and after class things turned back to "normal")

(By the time Potions class came around…let's just say no one was happy to still be in school. I mean who is?)

Kaiba: (walks into the classroom and sits at a table)

Tea and Yugi: (follow)

Joey: (smirks) Tired Potter?

Kaiba: Shut up.

(Just then Snape walks briskly into the room in the process slamming the door. He walks to the front of the room where a chalkboard is)

Yami: (sigh) Today we'll start with a simple potion. If some of you have studied, this should be like elementary school. (Yami is none other than… SNAPE!)

Yugi: (shocked)

Yami: (flips chalkboard around to where ingredients and instructions are there to make the potion) You may start.

(Yugi, Tea, Kaiba and everyone else get their cauldrons out along with the ingredients.)

Yugi: (leans over to Kaiba and Tea) I can't believe him.

Tea: Who, Snape?

Kaiba: Who'd have thought he'd go over to the dark side.

Yugi: (glare) He didn't go over to the dark side.

Kaiba: (glare) What are you complaining about? You hate Snape.

Yugi: N… (sigh) You're right.

(By about 45 minutes from the end of class Yugi and Kaiba were comparing the colors and textures of their potions)

Yugi: Harry did you know that if you added eye of newt to this it turns the nastiest shade of green?

Kaiba: (looks up) Eye of newt isn't even part of the ingredients.

Yugi: Really? Oops.

Kaiba: Mines bright blue. What's yours Hermione?

Tea: It's a pale yellow.

Kaiba: Do you think yours is wrong?

Tea: No.

Kaiba: (looks sadly at his ruined potion) Darn. Malfoy what color's yours?

Joey: (looks up then looks down) It's yellow.

Kaiba: What! How could his be closer than mine? (Grabs a few random jars and throws them into the cauldron) That should do it… (contents explode)

Yugi: Hey, good going Harry. I couldn't make mine explode.

Kaiba: (looks at the now black contents of his cauldron) Darn it's not yellow.

Yugi: (looks at clock) I think it's time for you to go to your Quidditch match.

Kaiba: (looks back down at cauldron and picks up some more ingredients) I don't think I'll go. What do you think will happen if I add this pink stuff?

Yugi: I don't know. Try it.

Kaiba: (adds pink stuff) Nothings happening… (cauldron starts on fire then explodes yet again) Darn. Still not yellow.

Yugi: Malfoy's leaving.

Kaiba: Good.

Tea: You have to go now Harry.

Kaiba: No, I don't think so (picks up a vile of some bright yellow liquid)

(Out of nowhere a pair of cops come onto the stage and drag Kaiba away from the cauldron. They, against his will, take him all the way to the Quidditch field where they set him down and watch him grudgingly walk into the changing room. After he is done dressing he walks onto the field with some random village people from his home town (Just so you know, I've done my research and well know that Ron is part of the Quidditch team. I also know that George and Fred got expelled so with that said I'm taking information from the 4th book okay?))

(Curtains close and Sakura steps out)

Sakura: Alright we need a temporary break at this time, so to pass the time my brother is going to sing a song he completely made up all by himself but used tunes from other songs. This isn't exactly relevant to the play so feel free to leave at this time and come back in about 5 minutes. He also can't carry a tune so all the people who can't stand that please leave. Okay, introducing, Kai!

Kai: (walks onto the stage, goes to the center of the stage and takes the microphone that Sakura offers him) Hello everybody, as you heard I'm going to sing a song called… "Macaroni".

"Some hotty once told me the world was macaroni 

_So I took a bite out of a tree_

_It tasted kind of crummy so I spit it on a bunny_

_And the bunny took a bite out of me_

_Yeah you think that's all but you'll never have it all_

_Can't you see that it's all about me, me, me?_

_Peach, punch, captain crunch_

_Brick wall, waterfall_

_Girl you think you got it all_

_You don't. I do._

_So poof with the attitude_

_Freeze, bam, bam, bam, bam, bam_

_Spiderman, you're the man_

_You've got the moves and all the groves._

_That's the way uhuh uhuh_

_I like it uhuh uhuh_

_(Fades out)"_

Kai: (bows to the applause he receives after the song)

Sakura: There you have it folks! Kai's song (looks at paper) "Macaroni!"

Kai: (bows again, hands the mike over to Sakura and exits off the stage)

Sakura: Interesting, no? Well that's the end of the break. Let's get back to the play!

(Sakura walks off the stage and the curtains open to show the Quidditch field and in the center are Joey and Kaiba, about five feet off the ground, sitting on their brooms with invisible fishing wire connecting the ends to the ceiling. Joey is wistfully looking at the ground hoping to something the wires don't break, and Kaiba is looking angrily at Joey cursing silently to whoever convinced him to do this stupid task and who he should send assassins after first)

Sakura: (from offstage) Now the object of the game is to catch the golden snitch the fastest while the chasers try to get the quaffle through the hoops. Ready? Game… START!

(The background screen on the stage moves backward and forward while the player's brooms carefully move the opposite direction so they don't fall off (hey what did you expect? This is a play). The snitch, a ways away, is fastly moving from one side of the stage to the other. All you can really see of it is the glint of gold in the stage light. Kaiba and Joey both see it obviously but in their current states the way the broom goes is the way they go. Off stage a ways you can just barely make out the shapes of Marik and Bakura)

(All of a sudden something small and silver flies through the sky and the next thing anyone knows both Kaiba and Joey's brooms are hanging by only one string)

Joey: (laughs nervously) Hey, Potter looks like you're in quite a situation there. How'd you fall off your broom?

Kaiba: (glares) You're in a situation yourself aren't you? So I wouldn't talk.

Joey: heh heh heh… (trails off) I guess you're right… (sigh) So what should we do now?

Kaiba: I'm going to catch the snitch.

Joey: How can you even be thinking about that at a time like this? We could fall to our deaths.

Kaiba: (shrug)

(To everyone's utter amazement Kaiba reaches up and grabs a hold of "thin air" and pulls up. He uses all his upper body strength to keep going and reaches the rafters, where he "disappears" into the sky. A few minutes later he comes back holding the golden ball we all know as the snitch. He grabs a hold once more of the "thin air" and slides back down to the broom)

Kaiba: (holds onto the broom one-handed) Hey, look! I won the game!

Sakura: (rolls eyes) And Gryffindor wins the first Quidditch game of the year!

(The brooms slowly lower and finally all the Quidditch players reach the ground and either gets off their brooms or, in Kaiba and Joey's case, reach the ground and just leave. After they bid their good byes…)

Joey: Hey, Potter. Good game, but you know that was a fluke right? I'll win next time.

Kaiba: Yeah and pigs will learn to fly. You know that right?

(They depart and go back to their dorms where parties await them both)

A/N: WAHAHAHAHAHA… (ahem) Okay, that's all for the second chapter. I'll try to get the next chapter up as soon as I possibly can. But that requires you, the readers, to push the little purple button at the bottom, take a couple seconds or minutes, or however long it takes you and review! Yay!


	3. Chapter 3

A Harry Potter Story

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Chapter 3

A/N: Sorry, sorry, sorry it took so long! I'm being a refugee at my dad's house so I haven't had a lot of time to do things, but I finally got this finished! Yay! You know I really didn't think I'd get this far. I really didn't. I got sunburned last weekend up north. Boo! (sigh) I didn't get any wood ticks on me though… just eaten alive by fire ants… I don't even know why I go up north when all I do is sit and get sunburned and then go inside so I don't get eaten alive by wood ticks. (sigh) One of my three great fears (shakes head) wood ticks, spiders and falling from high places… I'm so pathetic but curse them all anyway…

Disclaimer: I don't own YuGiOh or Harry Potter. I don't even own Sakura! Noo! Wait, yes I do, I invented her. Take that Fire Demoness Jaganshi and moongirlselene99! I may not have chose what color her hair was yet (was it brown? Pink? Purple? Gray?) but I invented her! You should bow to me for permission to use her (stands on computer swivel chair) WAHAHAHAHA… (chair tips) Whoa! (Takes a digger to the ground) Owww, pain… Don't try that at home kids… (miraculously recovers) On to the story!

Dedicated to: Fire Demoness Jaganshi, because she helped me with some of the ideas! A toast to you my friend!

(On their way up to the awaiting parties…)

Yugi: So Harry, what are you going to do to when we get back to the dorm?

Kaiba: Murder your brothers.

Tea: (gasp) You wouldn't! Why?

Kaiba: (shrug) They tried to kill me first, and because Malfoy will be in my debt.

Yugi: (clueless) Why?

Kaiba: Because I'll have avenged him along with myself.

Yugi: Oh.

(After making it past the moving staircase and then by the electronic picture, the Gryffindors were greeted with a very loud, "SURPRISE!" Kaiba looked around quickly, not looking the slightest bit surprised and found what he was looking for. He took off quickly toward the twin brothers who were looking quiet cocky)

Kaiba: (stopping in front of the brothers and growls) What do you think you were doing.

Bakura: (innocently) What do you mean? Congratulations on winning the first game.

Marik: That was really cool how you got the snitch. You'll have to tell me what spell you used to make yourself disappear like that.

Kaiba: (glowering) Do you really think I'm that naïve and stupid?

Bakura: (smirk) Well… we might have at one point but now… yes. We really didn't do anything.

Marik: Maybe it was someone else impersonating us.

Kaiba: Can you prove any of what you're saying?

Marik: Of course not.

Bakura: We were busy in a secret hallway, in a secret room, making secret new inventions.

Kaiba: That aren't secret any more… Maybe I should strangle you to death like I planned just so no one has to suffer the tragic fate of becoming test subjects.

Bakura: (smiles) Aw, come on, how fun would that be?

Kaiba: Loads (turns around and stalks back to Yugi and Tea)

Tea: So? What's up?

Kaiba: (glaring at thin air) They say they didn't do it.

Yugi: Well, is there any proof that shows they did do it?

Kaiba: (turns on Yugi) You're just saying that because your related to them.

Yugi: (disgustedly) Are you joking? I'm just saying that maybe someone is trying to frame them. I mean, could you really see them?

Kaiba: Yes. It looked exactly like them. They were behind the curtains sort of though…

Yugi: (shocked) You're unsure? Since when are you unsure?

Kaiba: (glares) Since they were behind the curtains.

Tea: Maybe we should check out the crime scene. I'm sure we'll be able to figure something out if we go there.

(So they exit the dorms, and leave all the people who were waiting there to do a party, and as they do the people in there continue partying anyway. They go back to the Quidditch grounds and stop dead in their tracks as they see that Joey and his cronies are already there)

Kaiba: (walks over to Joey) Okay, Malfoy, find anything interesting?

Joey: (looks weirdly at Kaiba) Since when are we on speaking terms, Potter?

Kaiba: Since right now. So, what did you find?

Joey: (rolls eyes) I found the silver thing that went flying through the air. It was over there by the Quidditch hoops. (shows Kaiba a very small, very sharp knife)

Kaiba: How did you figure out it wasn't Ron's brothers?

Joey: That was easy. I was just looking through there schedules. See? (Shows Kaiba schedule that is secretly a script that says, "Ron's brothers didn't do it")

Kaiba: How do you know it's not forged?

Joey: (rolls eyes) Because I know, rich boy. This is solid evidence that they didn't do it.

Kaiba: (looks closely at the "schedule") I think I know who's behind this. Voldemort!

Joey: (name doesn't faze him) I think your right. What do you think he wants this time?

Kaiba: He wants to kill me, remember? But you don't think he came here by himself do you? I think he has someone doing his dirty work for him, like always. Maybe… what was the unimportant, evil rat thing's name again?

Joey: (rolls eyes) Wormtail.

Kaiba: The name explains it all.

(Finally the others come from where ever they were to break Joey and Kaiba's "heart-to-heart" conversation)

Yugi: So, what have we figured out?

Joey: Someone's doing the "dark lord's" dirty work. Supposedly some of his cronies.

Tea: Great. Just great.

(After more searching and finding nothing, the boys and one girl go back to their own dorms to think it out. Not long after, though, "Professor McGonagall" came into the dorm and "strongly advised" Kaiba to follow "her" to Dumbledore's office. At the funky statue leading to Dumbledore's office…)

Ryou: (sigh) You are to go straight to his office. He will be there waiting for you (turns to the statue) Chocolate truffles. (A/N: Why? I don't know)

Kaiba: (goes up the stairwell and into Dumbledore's office where he is sitting facing away in a swivel chair) You wanted to see me?

(The chair swivels to reveal none other than Pegasus. Kaiba gawks and glares at Sakura behind the scenes. (Sakura: (shrugs)) Then gawks again)

Pegasus: (Pegasus is… DUMBLEDORE!) Why yes, I did Potter-boy. I hear there has been something strange happening in my school. Mind telling me what it is? Not that you don't have a choice, obviously.

Kaiba: (looks disgustedly at Pegasus) Sure, why not? I mean, why wouldn't I want to tell you? You are the head master, after all. That would be, so utterly rude.

Pegasus: Yes, it would. So why don't you go ahead and tell me.

Kaiba: (sigh) We think Voldemort is trying to kill me again.

Pegasus: We?

Kaiba: (sighs again) Malfoy and I.

Pegasus: (smiles) This is great. This means you two have patched up your differences? We should celebrate…

Kaiba: Of course not. It was just convenient at the time (looks at nearby wall (They're interesting you know))

Pegasus: Oh, well good luck on your investigation then. You may leave.

Kaiba: (shocked, looks back at Pegasus) What?

Pegasus: This is something you do often. I'm not going to try and stop you every single time, when you're just going to go against me anyway. Have fun.

(So speechless, Kaiba stormed out and went back to the dorm, to bypass the still partying Gryffindors and, to inform Yugi that their headmaster just basically told them to do whatever they wanted. After they decided they were going to take his words to heart, they went to sleep)

(In the morning in the Great Hall…)

Yugi: So Harry, what's the first thing you're going to do today?

Kaiba: (looks at the non-edible scrambled eggs) Not go to class.

Tea: (gasp) You guys can't skip classes! You'll get expelled!

Kaiba: Not if the headmaster is basically telling you you can.

(A little girl with obviously dyed red hair runs over and jumps into Yugi's arms and starts hugging him)

Rebecca: Ron! You can't skip school! Think of your education, your future! Mom's going to be pissed… (Rebecca is… GINNY!)

Kaiba: Ginny, we have a job to do. Voldemort is trying to kill me again. Do you want me to die?

Rebecca: (under her breath) Yes… No! Of course not. That would be terrible if you were to die! Who would save us all from the terrible things that seem to plague our school every year?

Kaiba: (rolls eyes) Exactly, that's why we have to listen to our loving headmaster and go about our usual business saving people. Mainly me (gets up and throws the eggs away) Let's go Ron. We have places to go and things to look up.

Yugi: (gets up too) Right.

(So the boys, yes just the boys Tea decided to go to school, went back to the Quidditch field to think about things and were again confronted with the problem of their arch enemies being there. Kaiba again walked up to Joey…)

Kaiba: What are you doing here?

Joey: Hey, you're not the only one "Dumbledore" called to his office. I went up there too. And just so you know, I don't care what he says but I don't like you, we're not going out and I never wish to ever know you in any way, shape, or form of the way he was talking about.

((Sorry I have to do this) Joey's thought bubble; it goes white and fluffy around the edges)

Kaiba: (gasp) Joey, how could you say that? I love you! Nooo! (runs away crying)

Joey: (standing there gawking, blinks a couple times)

(End Joey's thought bubble)

Joey: (blinks a couple more times, shakes head)

(Kaiba's thought bubble, goes white and fluffy around the edges)

Kaiba: (gasp) Joey, how could you say that? (glares very big daggers) I might just have to kill you now…

THWAK POW CRACK SNAP

Joey: every bone… in body…

Kaiba: You think that hurts? Die! I summon Blue-Eyes!

(Blue-Eyes White Dragon appears on the stage)

CENSOR CENSOR CENSOR CENSOR

(End Kaiba's thought bubble)

Kaiba: (smirk)

Yugi: Umm, guys? You okay?

Joey: (shakes head again) Yeah, I'm fine.

Kaiba: (glaring now) Yes, great.

Yugi: Oh, you just seemed so out of it for a second there. Now that you're back to normal, we can start this search.

Joey: But we already searched here. There're no other clues.

Kaiba: Malfoy, this is where we push strings and get to the bottom of things. Follow me.

(They go to the far side of the Quidditch field and open a secret door in the ground by one of the Quidditch hoops)

Joey: (sigh) I didn't think you meant that seriously when you said get to the bottom of things…

Kaiba: Shut up, Malfoy. I don't need you pissing and moaning you can stay here if you want.

Joey: No way! I'm coming too!

Kaiba: Then shut up and follow me.

(They took a long winding path all the way to somewhere…)

Joey: How much longer until we can go up?

Kaiba: You pathetic person. You should know the answer to that.

Yugi, Duke, and Tristan: I don't!

Kaiba: (sigh) We have to wait until they change the scenes. A little knock will go off and that means we can go (A/N: No one can hear or see them… They are under the floorboards)

Joey: And how do you know that?

Kaiba: I read the script moron.

KNOCK KNOCK

Kaiba: (stands up and lifts the floorboard) We're here!

A/N: hee hee hee! Where are the poor boys off to next? Where are they now? Do I even know? Remember ideas are welcome… not to say I will or won't use them but they're welcome! Greatly… How long is this going to be? Will there be an ending? I think I'm having brain damage or something… NOOOO! I will figure this out and I will make the perfect ending and I will make more stories than this one and… I have to figure out what my other stories are going to be about… hmm… Oh well… I'll get to that, eventually… so don't hurt me! Just review! R&R you know? Please? Even if it is just to say, "hi" or something? Okay, I'll stop begging now… Well… See you all, uh, Hear from you? Hmm… I'll write later, 'kay?


	4. Chapter 4

A Harry Potter Story

----

Chapter 4

A/N: (sigh) Okay… look. I've been debating this and I don't know how long this story is going to be. It probably won't go on much longer though. It is only a play after all. No one could give me any ideas? (sigh) Oh well. Alright since I just found out you can't write stories in script form I'm writing it a little differently. I'm hoping for this chapter to be my best one yet, I-hope-it-is, I-hope-it-is… Okay, here I go, onto the story!

Disclaimer: You know the drill people, nothing new to see here, move along. (Starts attempting to shove readers to the actual story, but not succeeding very well so pulls out squirt gun) Go, go, go!

Dedicated to: My long brown-haired friend who doesn't like anime but likes my story, also to JadeLioness3 who helped me (and gave me most of the ideas and words (but not exact words…)) with this chapter. Kudos to you girls. Toast!

The four boys who were (where we left off) under the floor boards, finally made their appearance to the audience. They looked around and discovered that they were in a sort of cemetery. Much like that of the one at the end of the fifth Harry Potter book. Tristan, who doesn't like cemeteries much, decided to play it safe and hide behind Duke, who in turn, hid behind Joey who hid behind Kaiba. Seeing that there was no one else to hide behind, besides a couple of real looking skeletons to the right of him which he chose NOT to hide behind, Kaiba played the non-caring hero and stood still. While no one appeared to be looking Duke and Tristan made a pact and proceeded to sneak off stage.

In the shadows you could see a short person wearing all black and to top it off a fancy looking shiny, navy blue cape.

"Who are you?" demanded Kaiba.

"I'm ashamed you don't remember me…" He takes a step out of the shadows to reveal himself. All the good-guys take a step back in shock. They are looking face to face with… (Da-da-da daaaaa) Mokuba! "Older brother." Mokuba finished.

"No. You can't…" Kaiba is currently going through traumatic shock, along with everyone else. (This is my fic. If I want they could be married… they're not of course… (shiver))

"Harry, we shouldn't be fighting on opposite sides, we should be standing together. Why don't you come join the dark side?"

"And risk being called more cold-hearted than I already am? No, I don't believe that to be necessary." Kaiba stated in that matter-of-fact tone.

"(sigh) Fine," Mokuba takes out a freshly baked cherry pie, "then I'll just have to eat this all by myself."

Kaiba was speechless for a second (probably because he was cursing the gods that Mokuba knew his one main week point besides his little brother). Mokuba then waved the pie in front of himself for affect. Kaiba looked forlornly at it, watching the wafts of smoke rise from the deliciously looking pie. Meanwhile, Sakura watches from the shadows absolutely horrified at the new turn of events the story has taken.

"So, brother, what's it going to be?" Mokuba demanded.

Kaiba glared over at his younger brother then glanced quickly behind him at his companions. His options were limited… "Fine." He stated before walking briskly over to his sibling. Joey watched this exchange with complete shock written on his face.

From the side of the stage then walked Pegasus, he walked all the way over to Joey.

"Malfoy," Pegasus said once he'd gotten over to the blonde, "We have to join forces to defeat He Who Must Not Be Named."

Joey appeared shocked then shook his head, "Nah, Headmaster, I've had enough of this freaky drama. I'm going home." Looking around to see his cronies were already long gone he started to walk away.

"Winky," (she's his house elf again) was all Pegasus said and Joey froze.

"What do you mean?" Joey asked. To this Pegasus threw Joey a picture of Mai…

"If you don't help defeat the evil you may find your friend there will be in quite a lot of trouble…" He trailed off. (Oh and Pegasus has his millennium eye back for this purpose.

"WHAT! WINKY!" Joey asked dumbfounded (That Mai could possibly be Winky and that she was now in danger)

"Yes, Winky. Now are you going to help me willingly? Or am I going to have to force you?"

Joey regained his composure, "You'll have to force me, but only if you plan on making your friend Madam Maxime, the Headmistress of Beauxbaton, go through hell again…" Pegasus looked at Joey with complete loathing and likewise, Joey tossed him a picture of Cecelia (if you don't know who that is it's Pegasus' wife that died of a mysterious illness, she's alive again because I said so)

"So you wish to go against me too… that will be your fault…"

Just then an explosion took place in the spot where Kaiba and Mokuba had previously occupied. Apparently they were fighting over who was going to get the last piece of cherry pie and started an all out war over it. After the smoke cleared a figured walked out of it, it was Professor Lockhart (or Weevil!) Everyone stares at the new person that made his appearance.

"Um… am I interrupting something?" Weevil asked nervously.

Mokuba and Kaiba started whispering then and looked over at Weevil with expectant smirks on their faces.

Mokuba was the one to tell them their plan, "Lockhart, since you were the one who popped out of our cherry pie you are going to have to be sacrificed to get us a new one. That's a new spell they just came out with, quite handy if I do say so myself…"

"WHAT! I'M NOT GOING TO BE USED FOR A SACRIFICE FOR SOME STUPID CHERRY PIE!" Weevil shouted.

Kaiba raised an eyebrow, "Is that so? Then who will be?"

Weevil started thinking at hyper speed, "I know! I'll perform a spell and get you a new sacrifice!"

"Hurry up and get to it then," Kaiba demanded.

Weevil raised his wand high above his head and prayed to the gods, and then he crossed his fingers and cast the spell… Nothing happened.

"Oh shoot…" Weevil cursed.

"That's really too bad for you, Lockhart, now you'll have to be our sacrifice."

"No, just wait, it usually takes a few minutes to work. Really!" Weevil pleaded.

Mokuba sighed, "If you say so, you have five minutes to make your spell start working."

Meanwhile, Joey and Pegasus are still fighting over who is going to give in first and let the other do what he wants. Finally they mutually agree that as soon as the others finally get their cherry pie back they'd fight together to retrieve it and eat for themselves.

Five minutes pass---

"Okay, you're five minutes are up. We gave you your chance," Kaiba forcefully stated.

"Wait, wait. Don't sacrifice me, please!"

Suddenly a poof resounded and when the smoke cleared we see Neville (aka: Rex!) sitting in a tree, looking through magnifying glasses.

"HEY! That's new!" Rex shouted staring fixedly at some gravestones far in the distance.

"This is fine, you may leave now." Kaiba gestured to Weevil who ran away very quickly. Not before we could see that he was now covered with moldy strawberries and smelt like icky green sludge. (His spell stank that bad…)

At hearing this Rex looked down to see all the people who happened to be there and looked at them all strangely.

"Hey! What are you guys doing down there? Are you stalking me?"

"You wish! We only wanted to use you as a sacrifice for our cherry pie!" Kaiba explained in that way you explain something when you're kind of ticked off.

"A sacrifice? No way! I refuse!" Rex screamed.

"Refuse? Did I say you had a choice in the matter?" Kaiba asked/said then there was yet again another poof, as Kaiba raised his wand, and soon you could see that Rex was tied by the feet with a string. He was tied to the tree and dangling over a boiling cauldron filled with who knew what.

"No! I won't be a sacrifice for a cherry pie! I won't, I won't!" Just then a light bulb clicked on and everyone went temporarily blind.

"Sorry!" A voice yelled and the lights went back to the way they were. Everyone sat for awhile and blinked away the red dots they all had dancing in their vision and then the play started again.

This time a figurative light bulb went off and Rex pulled out his wand.

"Uh-Oh," Mokuba said and ran and ducked for cover.

Like Mokuba probably predicted, the spell went wrong. Not in an entirely bad way though. As they looked back to Rex, fireworks were going off. Red, white, blue… the works. That went on for a good few minutes and then they noticed that Rex was no longer there.

ANOTHER poof of smoke came out of nowhere and there stood Rex's lawyer. He pronounced this killing a suicide and gave everyone free lollipops. Now because Rex killed himself they didn't need to sacrifice him, (he sacrificed himself) and the pie was returned to its cherry goodness.

So everyone skipped off into the sunset (even though it was only 2:00 in the afternoon) holding hands and when they got back to Hogwarts, they all had a tea party with cherry pie and wore frilly dresses. So they all lived happily ever after with peace and love for all in the land of happy unicorns….

THE END!

(Curtains close)

The audience stares at the curtains and look shocked at them at the quickness of the ending. Then Sakura comes out.

"Well… I believe that's the end of the show… heh heh, I thank you all for coming here today to see it. Have a nice night."

After they realize the play really is over, they start clapping.

"YAY!"

"That was so sweet!"

"I'm coming next week Thursday!"

"Cherry Pie!"

Some people throw flowers on the stage which Sakura politely picked up and then walked behind the curtains.

"Whew! That was close," Sakura walks up to the severely traumatized group of people she used in her play, "I can't believe you guys completely went against the script!"

Snapping out of it somewhat, Joey asks dazedly, "What script?"

"The one I gave to you this morning! The one you guys kept disguising as schedules! But I guess the outcome was okay… You guys better not quit your day jobs and go out for acting."

"I don't have a day job!" Mokuba whined.

"That's completely beside the point. Oh well. You guys have a nice life. I'm going home to take a nice relaxing bath."

"Hey. What about our pay checks?" Kaiba demanded, "I didn't say I was going to humiliate myself in front of a crowd for free."

Sakura does the cute innocent look, "What are you talking about?" Sidestepping away from them, "I don't have any money. I don't know what you're talking about. Here, have some more cherry pie."

She makes a run for it, which is saying something since she has no athletic coordination whatsoever and gets out run almost immediately by someone who doesn't like cherry pie…

"No, wait! Don't hurt me! Here, have some lollipops! Candy! Ahhhh!" She eventually gets doggy piled by more and more people. "NOO! HELP, SOMEBODY! ANYBODY! NOOOOO!

A/N: (sigh) Now what to do… Again I thank my anime disliking friend and JadeLioness3; I don't know where I'd be without them. That's the end folks. I really didn't think it would be this short but… Cest la vie. I hope you had a good time reading this. Now I need some people's opinions, should I do a different story? Should I do another play? Should I quit writing cold turkey because you think my writing sucks? (cowers from JadeLioness3) Okay, okay, it doesn't suck… So anyway… What do you people think? R&R!


End file.
